Breakfast Special: Danny Ainge Makes LeBron His…

To say that the Celtics won the Kyrie Irving-for-Isaiah Thomas and the Nets 2018 pick trade is to have a grasp on the obvious so glaring that you’re probably dressed up in a silly outfit and introducing Shaqtin’ A Fool. Thomas and LeBron James got into a scuffle after the Cavaliers’ disastrous offensive performance against the Miami Heat, where James called out his teammate’s poor (2-of-15) shooting as the Cavs… …wait, Cleveland won? What the actual…? Yep. The Cavs beat the Heat 91-89, their atrocious offense matched by a display of defense so surprising that even the Browns, looking up …

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Breakfast Special: James Harden Is On Another Level

James Harden has done something that your humble columnist hasn’t managed to pull off in thousands of hours of playing NBA Live and 2K over the years. That’s how utterly ridiculous his 60-point triple-double, which broke the record held by Russell Westbrook (and previously held for almost 50 years by Wilt Chamberlain) for points while recording a triple-double in a game. The perhaps even wilder thing about all this is that Harden did it in 46 minutes of a relatively slow-paced game; the Rockets’ 114-107 win over Orlando was played at an estimated pace of only 93.3, snail-like by today’s …

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Breakfast Special: That Ain’t No Devastated Giannis Antetokounmpo

Giannis Antetokounmpo was “devastated” when the Milwaukee Bucks fired Jason Kidd last week. But let’s face it; they’re 4-0 since the move, playing great basketball, and got their first win over a quality opponent in that mini-winning-streak when they beat the 76ers at home 107-95 Monday night. Giannis had 31 points, 18 rebounds, six assists, and contributed to a defensive effort that held Philly to just 2-of-26 (7.7 percent!) shooting on threes. The Bucks also turned the ball over just nine times (Nine times? Niiine tiiimes.) Oh, and just to rub it in, Milwaukee hit 20-of-22 from the free throw …

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Breakfast Special: Still Russell Westbrook’s World

It remains a fundamental truth of the universe that when Russell Westbrook wants to impose himself on the stat sheet, there is not a player in the world who can stop him. Westbrook went for 37 points, 14 assists, and nine rebounds Sunday in the Thunder’s 122-112 win over the Philadelphia 76ers, and as if that weren’t impressive enough? Steven Adams had 10 offensive rebounds. TEN. Anything OKC’s Big Three misses, Adams just hoovers up and puts back; Adams’ 20 points came on 10-of-11 shooting. Oh, and newly-minted All-Star and injury replacement Paul George went for 31 of his own. …

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Breakfast Special: Kevin Durant, Number 1 Pick

Well, you gotta hand it to Kevin Durant. He was finally the first overall pick at something. Durant got selected first in the All-Star “draft” for Team LeBron James, and the Warriors’ top mercenary even drew a great response from the Trail Blazers on Twitter that doubled as a vicious burn on Greg Oden: Our bad. https://t.co/6unnr17EP5 — Trail Blazers (@trailblazers) January 26, 2018 Ouch. Meanwhile, on TNT, the Dubs beat the Timberwolves 126-113, shooting an insane 21-of-37 (56.8 percent) from three-point land; Durant had 28 while Stephen Curry and Klay Thompson had 25 each, the three combining to shoot …

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Breakfast Special: Featuring Damian Lillard’s All-Star Beef Sandwich

Man, sometimes you just want to skip ahead to the lightning round, with a fairly modest slate of games in terms of playoff implications. But then Russell Westbrook goes out and beefs with Damian Lillard about the latter’s All-Star selection and the snubbing of Paul George, and it’s on like Donkey Kong. Mind you, the Blazers didn’t play Oklahoma City—that would’ve been too perfect—but instead took it out on the Minnesota Timberwolves at home by a 123-114 count. Lillard laid the smackdown on Minnesota, scoring 31 points to lead Portland in a game where defense was for suckers; the Blazers …

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Breakfast Special: LeBron Joins the 30,000 Point Club

LeBron James has done the inevitable, and of course he’d do it in a game that had been scheduled for national TV before the season even started. At the end of the first quarter of Cleveland’s 114-102 loss to the Spurs, LeBron hit a jump shot from the midrange, reaching the 30,000-point milestone at the youngest age out of any of the seven guys to pull off the feat in NBA history: LeBron James: Point #30,000 pic.twitter.com/y9cIvMY7ig — Kyle Kuzwob (@World_Wide_Wob) January 24, 2018 LeBron is the only player in NBA history with 30,000 points, 8,000 rebounds, and 7,500 assists, …

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Breakfast Special: Boogie Cousins 44, Jason Kidd 0

C’mon, DeMarcus Cousins. There ought to be an NBA rule; if I can’t do something with a player in NBA 2K18, he’s got no business doing it in real life. And 44 points, 24 rebounds, and 10 assists? No way. That is a 2K impossibility. Let’s just stop to consider that nobody had done a 40/20/10 in my lifetime… DeMarcus Cousins tallied 44 PTS, 24 REBS & 10 ASTS in the @PelicansNBA win tonight. The last player in @NBAHistory to put up at least 40 PTS/20 REBS/10 ASTS in a game was Kareem Abdul-Jabbar on 2/26/1972 (44 PTS, 20 REBS, …

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Breakfast Special: Day Of The Underdogs

While the public attention was distracted by pro football, the NBA put on an interesting four-part show for the world’s entertainment; it was a rarity in that not only did all four teams with the worse record beat the team with the better record coming into the game, but three of them did it on the road. And indeed, if you took the four basketball games and two football games and put them together, the underdog covered the spread in all six cases and won outright in five; only the Jacksonville Jaguars, who fell short late in a 24-20 loss …

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Breakfast Special: A Near-Choke In Cleveland

The Cleveland Cavaliers needed a win to snap the funk they’ve been in lately, but a 104-103 win over the Orlando Magic at home in a game where the Cavs nearly choked away a 20-point halftime lead despite their opponent making only five three-pointers the whole game? That’s bad. Like almost as bad as if they’d lost bad. LeBron James had 16 points on 7-of-16 shooting, a dreadfully inefficient performance for the King, and Isaiah Thomas, while leading the team with 21 points, shot 40 percent from the field and 30 percent behind the three-point line. Kevin Love got his …

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