Keep Victor Oladipo Sealed And Refrigerated When Not In Use

Victor Oladipo missed the Pacers’ 111-102 loss to the Wizards Monday night, a statement game that could’ve vaulted Indiana all the way to fourth in the East, with an illness. Indiana is now 0-6 without him. They’re 30-19 (a 50-win pace over 82 games!) with him. What does this tell us? Well, mostly it tells us that Oladipo should be kept in a sealed container in the refrigerator so that he doesn’t get bacterial growth. Just keep him away from all humans who could make him sick, except in the offseason, where he can have his immunity built up. But …

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Should Myles Turner Be Indiana’s Sixth Man?

Over the course of this season, we’ve learned some things about Myles Turner, and they’re not necessarily the lessons we’d hoped to learn watching him navigate his first two seasons in the league. In particular, the belief that his ceiling was “rich man’s Hassan Whiteside” may have been a bit overly optimistic. Turner, unlike Whiteside, is a terrible rebounder, and he’s so afraid of contact that you’d think he was shooting 30 percent from the free throw line and not 77.8 for his career. Instead, his ceiling is more “Roy Hibbert with a jump shot.” The Pacers are 9-7 when …

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The Indiana Pacers Need To Stand Pat At Trade Time

Hey, remember when Larry Bird got himself run out of town in Indianapolis thanks largely to a slew of terrible win-now moves he made during offseasons and at the trade deadlines that did nothing to turn the Pacers into a contender and instead just condemned them to Mediocrity Hell until Paul George forced their hand? Well, you see, Kemba Walker‘s on the trading block, and Pacers fans, looking at their seventh-place team, are starting to make noise on Twitter, and… Stop. Seriously. Just stop. This team was supposed to win 30 games this year while Victor Oladipo and Domantas Sabonis …

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