Breakfast Special: Golden State Has a Three-Point Problem

The Warriors have a legitimate issue out beyond the three-point arc.

Namely, nobody on the team besides Stephen Curry is hitting them with any regularity anymore.

Steph is 46-of-89 (51.7 percent!) beyond the arc, draining threes with beautiful and reckless abandon, playing like he wants to hit 500 of them just to future-proof the single-season record (he’s on pace to hit 539, but that would be if he played all 82 games, which we all know he won’t.)

The rest of the team? 34-of-121 (28.1 percent.)

But on the other hand, the Warriors continue to chug along close to the basket; they’re hitting 59 percent of their two-point shots.

And with that in mind, Steph had 35 points on 7-of-15 from three-point land while the rest of the team was 6-of-18, Kevin Durant had 34 points while making 9 of his 14 two-pointers (and 2 out of his 6 threes) and going 10-of-11 from the line, and the Warriors beat the Nets 120-114 in Brooklyn in a game Golden State led by 16 after three quarters.

Oh, and Draymond Green had another Draymond Game, with eight points, 13 assists, and five steals, and what on Earth is up with his stat lines sometimes? He’ll put up those wacky Minnesota Ricky Rubio games shooting the ball (4-of-9) and still have a massive impact.

Also, what the crap happened to Klay Thompson? How is he shooting 39.6 percent from the field and a horrifying 13.9 percent from deep on 5-of-36 for the season?

For real, someone tell me what happened to Klay, because he’s shooting like he’s got a broken wrist.

Anyway, you came here for highlights, and got to give the people, give the people what they want:

And hey, since the Warriors’ social media person so generously provided them…

HERO OF SERBIA

Look, I don’t know how many times I have to say it before it sinks in, but Boban Marjanovic has completely and utterly broken the sport of basketball, his advanced stats defying all reason and logic.

HERO OF SERBIA attempted (and missed) the first three-pointer of his career Sunday night, but he was otherwise perfect, going 6-of-7 and making his lone free throw on his way to 13 points, 9 rebounds, 2 blocks, a steal, and an assist…

…in TWELVE MINUTES. WHAT THE CRAP?!

Through 56 minutes, Boban is up to a 37.7 PER, .420 WS/48, and a 5.6 BPM. This makes no sense at all. This doesn’t just break advanced stats. It breaks advanced stats, throws advanced stats down on the ground for a beatdown like the printer in “Office Space”, then drags advanced stats into the bathroom for a swirlie.

Oh, and the Clippers beat the Wizards 131-104 because Washington sucks and they’re about to be the biggest capped-out Roland Emmerich movie of a franchise since the mid-aughts Knicks.

Tobias Harris led nine (!!) Clippers in double figures as he notched 22 points on 9-of-13 shooting.

The Clips as a team shot 54.4 percent from the field and 55.2 percent from long range.

And oh by the way, LA also won the rebounding (57-45) battle.

But for real, the man of the match could only be the Breakfast Special GOAT:

That’s One Way to Get Your First Win

All you have to do is play at home against the Suns to get your first win as a foundering disaster area of a team.

The Oklahoma City Thunder did exactly that, beating Phoenix 117-110 behind 20 points and 15 boards from Nerlens Noel and 23 points each from Paul George and Russell Westbrook.

The 22 turnovers the Suns committed didn’t hurt either.

And Westbrook? He seems to have abandoned the three-pointer, not even attempting one, and if he wants to pretend he’s Ben Simmons now, who’s gonna stop him? Not me.

The Suns shot 26-of-27 from the free throw line. Extra sprints and push-ups for you, Elie Okobo. You just went 5-of-6. Nice job breaking it.

How about a little star power for the Grand Theft Sonics:

And Finally…

The Utah Jazz are 0-2 at home and 4-0 on the road.

The terrorizing of home crowds continued in Dallas on Sunday as the Jazz beat the Mavericks 113-104.

Donovan Mitchell had another one of his patented Jerry Stackhouse Specials, scoring 20 points on 10-of-19 shooting, making zero three-pointers and zero free throws. He also had four assists against five turnovers, just a single rebound, a steal, and a block.

Mitchell has a ways to go before he’s just a Dark Ages-grade scorer.

Rudy Gobert was far more efficient, scoring 23 points on 9-of-13 shooting and making 5-of-6 from the line to go along with his 16 rebounds and three blocks.

The Jazz shot 52.5 percent as a team in this one, They continue to be lethal in the games that end up mattering most when the season standings are tallied at the end of the year.

We’ll be back with more highlights tomorrow, but in the meantime, please do enjoy some of our other fine features, and thanks for reading!